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Disorganised1
Coventry
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796 of 801  Mon 15th Jun 2020 8:29pm  
Member: Joined Nov 2012  Total posts:259

I've decided to get a cleaner to help with the housework. The agency sent an Eastern European woman round today. It took her 3 hours to hoover the lounge! Turned out she was a slow vac.
Non-Coventry - Have a laugh!
Slim
Another Coventry kid
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797 of 801  Mon 15th Jun 2020 9:24pm  
Member: Joined Mar 2013  Total posts:773

That sucks.
Non-Coventry - Have a laugh!
Slim
Another Coventry kid
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798 of 801  Fri 18th Sep 2020 8:01am  
Member: Joined Mar 2013  Total posts:773

A Vicar is very upset because he believes that one of his parishioners has stolen his bicycle. He goes to see the Bishop to seek some advice. After a while, the Bishop says, “I have a plan. At the church service on Sunday devote your sermon to the Ten Commandments. When you get to the one about ‘Thou Shalt Not Steal’ – take your time and look carefully at each member of the congregation. Stare hard and look to see if anyone looks a bit sheepish. If so, I would suggest that that is the person who has stolen your bicycle” The Vicar thanked the Bishop for his advice and went off to prepare his sermon. The following week, the Bishop saw the Vicar on his bicycle. The Bishop says – “I see you have got your bicycle back. Did my plan work?” The Vicar replied – “Well sort of – I did what you advised and started my sermon on the Ten Commandments – but when I got to the one about ‘Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery’ – I suddenly remembered where I had left it!"
Non-Coventry - Have a laugh!
Kaga simpson
Peacehaven, East Sussex
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799 of 801  Fri 18th Sep 2020 9:49am  
Member: Joined Sep 2014  Total posts:3752

Brill!
Non-Coventry - Have a laugh!
Mr Blue Sky
Abingdon, Oxfordshire
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800 of 801  Sat 19th Sep 2020 10:11am  
Member: Joined Feb 2012  Total posts:66

A man on a parachute jump struggles to open his chute, passes a man going the other way and shouts, “Excuse me, do you know anything about parachutes?” “No, but what do you know about gas boilers?”
Non-Coventry - Have a laugh!
Mr Blue Sky
Abingdon, Oxfordshire
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801 of 801  Thu 15th Oct 2020 12:02pm  
Member: Joined Feb 2012  Total posts:66

I went shopping yesterday but had no joy as three of the shops had problems. Monsoon was shut due to flooding, Jigsaw was also shut as there was a piece missing and finally, Trespass was shut as they had had a burglary.
Non-Coventry - Have a laugh!

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